Last post, we examined the Wheel of Fear, and looked at how it turns tighter and tighter until it has you in a stranglehold. Now, let's look at how your Wheel of Freedom operates.
Remember my fictional client, Bob? When he talks about his wheel of freedom, he becomes more relaxed. His relief is evident. He leans forward, almost conspiratorially, as he shares his experience. When I'm on my wheel of freedom, he says, I am able to see others as innocent. I see myself as innocent, too. I am able to forgive them and me. I have patience. I no longer feel the need to be perfect.
Mary's comments are similar. On my wheel of freedom, I honor my boundaries, she notes. I no longer feel the need to please everyone else. I am able to say no when I mean no, and yes when I mean yes. I show as much compassion to myself as I show to others. I remember to remind myself of my commitments. And honor them.
Like the Wheel of Fear, the Wheel of Freedom also has four components that work in sequence. Their effect is opposite to the Wheel of Fear. In turning lefty-loosey, the Wheel of Freedom gives us the tools and permission to unwind. To loosen the screws that the Wheel of Fear tightens. To slow, stop, then melt the snowball.
Let's look at the Wheel of Freedom's components:
Component 1. Your Essential Nature
Your Essential Nature is the heart of you. It's the most denied aspect of yourself. It's the one quality you possess that, when utilized, shifts your mindset. It's the quality that gives you permission to be kind to yourself and others. Once you're aware of your essential nature, you can use it to govern your thoughts and actions. Until then, it stays hidden. You may show it others, consciously and unconsciously, even without knowing what it is. Yet you may show it only fleetingly to yourself.
Component 2. Proactive Behaviors
Proactive behaviors are the things you do that remind you to think, act and speak from your Essential Nature as opposed to your Trigger. Actions you take to combat fear. Activities that move you from fear to freedom. Actions that are simple to do. Proactive behaviors are easy to do, yet may feel like risks in the moment.
Component 3. Wholeness
Wholeness is the feeling we get when all is right with the world. It's the best feeling in the world. The quality you'd give everyone if you could. With this quality, you feel whole. Complete. Satisfied. At peace. You don't have to work to obtain wholeness. It happens naturally when you are living on your Wheel of Freedom. Cool, huh?
Component 4. Self-Affirming Behaviors
Self-affirming behaviors do exactly as they say. They affirm that you're in your wholeness. These are actions that flow from your wholeness. Actions that are expressions of your wholeness. Actions that occur naturally, without forethought. Actions that, although they are risks, are effortless results of living in Freedom.
Putting it All Together
As the trip onto the Wheel of Fear often starts with a Fear Response, the shift onto the Wheel of Freedom often starts with a Proactive Behavior. A tangible reminder to shift your energy. An action that causes you to pause and refocus. The list of proactive behaviors is huge. And individualized. Bill often uses a glance at his watch as his reminder to refocus. Mary likes to call her best friend for support.
This is how the whole thing works: First, you begin by discovering your trigger and your wheel of fear components. Next, you discover your essential nature and wholeness. You select proactive behaviors that resonate with you. Then you use them, and watch what happens! The keys: awareness and willingness.
Does this sound too easy to be possible? Or too complicated to be workable? Are you relieved? Confused? Terrified? I can help you discover your wheels. You'll learn your trigger. Your core negative feeling. Your essential nature. And your wholeness. We'll brainstorm proactive behaviors that are easy and natural for you to use in any situation. Contact me within the next seven days (before the next blog entry), for a special offer I've prepared just for you. Use the contact form in the sidebar or comment below that you'd like me the in touch.
Question: How might your life change if you were able to operate from a place of freedom instead of fear?
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