What are acknowledgements, anyway? In Fearless Living, we use acknowledgements to remind ourselves that hey, we did that! We thought that! We recognized that! We shifted! Oftentimes, we may think of acknowledging others for something they achieved, yet ignore ourselves. That feeling of, "I'm not good enough" gets in the way. The feeling that tells us we're undeserving of our own praise. That feeling that tells us we're not good enough. No matter what we do. And yet, we ARE good enough. Here's how to get ourselves back on track.
Get yourself a small notebook that will fit into your pocket or purse. Choose a favorite color or design. Something that speaks to you. And a special pen. Not a fan of paper and pen? A smartphone app will work, too. An app like Evernote allows you to create notebooks. Create one titled "Acknowledgements", or whatever similar title works for you.
On the first, pristine page of that notebook, write the following title: "Today, I acknowledge myself for"
Leave a few lines blank, then write today's date.
Each day, consider everything you think, do, say and feel. What is different for you in each of those areas? What shifts have you experienced? What have you done more (or less) of? What insights have you had? How have you taken care of yourself? Supported yourself? Where have you stood up for your boundaries? Expressed your needs? Let go of something that was not supportive?
On a separate line, write down your insights, always beginning with, "Today, I acknowledge myself for...". Strive for 5 a day. Each day, start a new list, beginning with the date. Only thought of 1 today? Great! That's one more than you were doing before you started your list. No beating yourself up - perfection is not necessary here! Its willingness that counts.
Perhaps you'd like to set an intention around acknowledgements. "Today, I am willing to practice acknowledging myself for shifts in what I think, do, say or feel." Or use whatever words resound with you. You might want to post that intention to serve as a reminder.
Think about how you will support yourself in writing your acknowledgements. Some people like to write theirs at the end of the day, as they reflect on the day's events. Others like to write their list in the morning, using their dreams to support them. They leave their notebook on their headboard, under their glasses. Or on their alarm. Or by their phone. Others carry their notebook with them. They feel it in their pocket, or see it in their purse. I like to write mine as things happen during the day. I use Evernote. I have a reminder in my2Do app, and I set an alarm on my phone a couple of times to remind me, in case I've gotten so busy I've forgotten to write.
Need ideas what to acknowledge yourself for? Here are some of mine: Did I speak softly to my son just now as he was having a meltdown? Yay, me! Did I make an appointment for a long-overdue haircut? Yes! Did I think about writing a menu plan? New thought, woohoo! Did I last *one minute* longer on the treadmill? Go me! Did I contact a friend to satisfy my need for connection? Did I honor my boundaries and end a conversation when I was being yelled at? Did I use a proactive behavior when I recognized I was in fear? Did I *think* of that behavior, even if I didn't get to the point of using it? All shifts, and all worthy of acknowledgement.
Phrase your acknowledgements in the positive. They're not about what you didn't do, they about what you did. Example: instead of "Today I acknowledge myself for not telling my boss I think she's a jerk" say, "Today, I acknowledge myself for remaining calm when my boss was upset."
Now, choose a date for an annual review of your list. New Year's Eve? Your birthday? The anniversary of a significant date in your life? Whatever makes sense to you. On that day, flip through your acknowledgement list, and celebrate your growth. Congratulations to you!
On days when you are feeling as though you're not good enough, flip through your list. You ARE good enough to have done all this :) On days when you're beating yourself up, flip through your list. Savor your acknowledgements.
Notice how you feel, as you are in the midst of acknowledging yourself. And as you review. Proud? Accomplished? Less likely to beat yourself up? Acknowledgements are the cure for beating yourself up. The reminder that you are, in fact, good enough. Try them. Let me know how it goes.
Question: what tools will you use to create your acknowledgements list?
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