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Wednesday 24 February 2016

The Cure for Beating Yourself Up

Self-blame. Kicking yourself in the pants. Chastising yourself. Self-correction.  Beating yourself up.  No matter what you call it, we all do it.  We'd love to stop, yet we can't seem to do so. And beating outlives up is one of the most negative things we can do. It demotivates us.   It disempowers us.  The good news is: we can learn how to stop beating ourselves up.  Read on to find out how.



Wednesday 17 February 2016

No More Complaining!

We all love to complain.  The weather.  The boss. The kids. The neighbors.  Relatives.  Other drivers.  If any of these push your buttons, that's normal.  If you're vocal about your opinions, you're not alone.  After all, everyone knows that that jerk next door loves to run his lawnmower
at 8:00 am on Sundays.  And everyone hates him for it.  Why shouldn't you let the others know you're on their side?


Wednesday 3 February 2016

Acknowledgements versus Affirmations: What works & What doesn't

There are tons of people out there who are fans of affirmations.  If you're one of them, great!  I'll show you how to take affirmations to a deeper level.  Not a fan?  Wonderful!  Let's discover acknowledgements and how they can support, or replace, affirmations.





https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affirmations_(New_Age) says, "Affirmations New Thought and New Age terminology refer primarily to the practice of positive thinking and self-empowerment—fostering a belief that "a positive mental attitude supported by affirmations will achieve success in anything."[1] More specifically, an affirmation is a carefully formatted statement that should be repeated to one's self and written down frequently. For an affirmation to be effective, it needs to be present tense, positive, personal and specific."[2] 

Do affirmations work?  No.   

It was reported in 2009 that a study had found positive affirmation(s) to have a detrimental effect on those who need it the most, because people with low self-esteem will perceive the affirmation as so unbelievable that it strengthens their negative mindset. Those who already have high self-esteem feel slightly better, and those who don't will feel worse than if they had been allowed negative thoughts. When people with high self-esteem uses positive affirmation, it acts as a buffer for constructive criticism that goes against the self-perception, and when people with low self-esteem uses positive affirmation, it rings untrue and therefore brings to mind exactly how they are not successful, loved, etc.[11]

Do affirmations work?  Yes. 

"According to Rhonda Britten, affirmations work best when combined with acknowledgements because the acknowledgements build up a backlog of results in one's mind to prove that one can do what one is affirming.

 So, for example, the acknowledgement "I bought a good pair of sneakers and some gym clothes" could complement the affirmation "I can reach my goal of losing 20 pounds." The goal is to focus on steps one has taken toward accomplishing one's goals rather than criticizing oneself for what one hasn't yet accomplished, or could theoretically have accomplished but didn't."

Confused? 

Here's How To Use Acknowledgements to Support or Replace Affirmations

1.  Be specific.  Acknowledge every step of the process. See the example above for inspiration.

2.  Be expansive.  Acknowledge a shift in thought patterns, an insight, and the tiniest action.  It's not about perfection, or completion, it's about movement forward.  Each new thought, insight and shift will bring you closer to achievement. 

3.  Be consistent. Write 5 acknowledgements each day.  Use the format, "Today, I acknowledge myself for...." You can do it!  Can't think of 5?  I challenge you to break one acknowledgement into 5 parts.  In the example above, acknowledge yourself for realizing that you needed clothing, for committing to getting it, for driving to the store, for  trying on clothes, and for selecting your favorites.  Got it!

Love affirmations?  Great!  Reinforce your affirmation with acknowledgements.  Your visualization will become more real.

Hate affirmations? Great!   Leave them behind, and empower yourself with acknowledgements instead. 


Question:  How will acknowledgements propel you to further action?